27 May 2005

Ties get you laid

For anyone really wondering how to get laid and are lacking the confidence to smack a girl around (girls like assholes), ties are the next best thing. And Christian girls walk a fine line between secretly wanting to be defecated on while performing their first internet-breaking bukakke premiere (from the Japanese ぢっかけ) and looking for a nice guy to bring to church with them, doing good will with, and essentially trying to live up to the Big Guy's expectations. Though, I also find that more Christian men are dogged by Christian morals than Christian women — till they get fucking old and stupid, that is, then they seem to latch onto it in hope that God doesn't judge them for fucking assholes in college — and the men seem to, statistically opposed to women, get a bit wiser in regards to human nature.

But if you wanna pick up some girls (they won't be above 4–5 on the scale) at some local community functions, here's where you have to start: 2002 Ties.

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